• jdettmann

The Lazy Person’s Guide To Buying A Christmas Present For My Dad


book

1. Is it a book?

Yes: go to question 2.

No: Select again and go back to question 1.

2. Does it have endnotes?

Yes: Go to question 3.

No: Select again and go back to question 1.

3. Does it have a ribbon to mark which page you are up to? Or preferably two ribbons: one for the narrative and one for the endnotes? (I’ve worked in publishing for ten years. You’d think I’d know the proper name for such a ribbon, but I don’t. All I know is that it is not a search criterion on any online bookshops I’ve found, which is a huge mistake on their part.)

Yes: Go to question 4.

No: Select again and go back to question 1.*

4. Is it about World War II in Papua New Guinea?

Yes: Buy it.

No: Go to question 5.

5. Is it about a pre-1940s explorer, and does the cover feature a black and white photo of men whose faces you can’t see because they are wrapped up against the cold or polar bears or something?

Yes: Buy it.

No: Go to question 6.

6. Is it about Australian politics, pre-1950?

Yes: Buy it.

No: Go to question 7.

7. Leave the bookshop. Do John Clarke and Brian Dawe have a new DVD out?

Yes: Buy it.

No: Frame yet another picture of May Blossom and be done with it.

*Exception to the no-ribbon rule: if the book lacks a ribbon but is in all other respects the perfect gift, it is acceptable to supplement the book with a packet of those fancy plastic sticky flags that come in four colours.

#Shopping #christmas #Father #WorldWarII #Life #Dad #Humor #gifts #PapuaNewGuinea

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