Jessica Dettmann

JESSICA DETTMANN

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    The Enemy of Creativity
    jdettmann
    • Jan 30, 2017
    • 2 min

    The Enemy of Creativity

    May Blossom’s in Year One now, which was easy to tell at drop-off this morning because seventy-five percent of the class had a hand in their mouth playing with their new wobbly teeth. Garnet’s started at new preschool, closer to home and he scootered himself down there this morning as happy as can be. It’s the same pre-school I went to. They appear to have all the same toys they did in 1983. The missing hat threw me a bit this morning, because I was determined to be Super Org
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    When You Think He’s Fast Asleep, He’s Always Wide Awake
    jdettmann
    • Jan 15, 2014
    • 3 min

    When You Think He’s Fast Asleep, He’s Always Wide Awake

    Why the italics, you might ask. What has Gusto done to merit that? Nothing. Gusto is being an exemplary feline. It is the jellicle cats that are the problem around here. The cats created by T. S. Eliot in his 1939 book of poems Old Possum’s Book of Practical Cats and made more annoying to the power of infinity by Andrew Lloyd-Webber in 1981. You see, about three months ago May Blossom, Garnet and I tagged along with Other Jess to a Year 6 Production of Cats at the school wher
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    Flat-packed
    jdettmann
    • Dec 12, 2013
    • 3 min

    Flat-packed

    So sweet, you’d never know they have tiny ear canals brimming with filth and germs. Nor that the one on the right is about to throw up in that car seat. My big brother emailed me today with two queries. ‘When you gonna blog again?’ and ‘How’s your wedding Adirondacks?’ The second question is easier to answer. The Adirondacks to which he refers so grammatically incorrectly are two chairs that he gave H and me for our wedding present. We got married in April 2009. He dropped of
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    More Cat, Less Complaining
    jdettmann
    • Dec 2, 2012
    • 1 min

    More Cat, Less Complaining

    Obie in repose Obie in terror. Poor old Gusto. Since Obie died she doesn’t really have anyone to frighten any more. Tormenting Obiedog was one of the great joys of her life. Not so much one of the joys of Obie’s life. Someone asked for more Gusto on the blog, which is, after all, named after her. So I might give you some more photo posts of Gusto’s antics. Anything that gives you people a break from my moaning about my pelvis can’t be bad, right? #Cats #Fear #Pregnancy #Life
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    My Wedding Advice
    jdettmann
    • Nov 24, 2012
    • 3 min

    My Wedding Advice

    My most excellent friends Nic and Wilf are getting married today! So, in their honour, I present my top ten pieces of wedding day advice. 1. If your dress has buttons down the back with tiny button loops, do them up and undo them a few times before the moment when you are running forty-five minutes late for the ceremony. That is not the time to have your bridesmaid attempt to do them up for the first time. That will lead only to nervous panic and a call made to the seated gue
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    The Cat’s Pyjamas
    jdettmann
    • Nov 21, 2012
    • 1 min

    The Cat’s Pyjamas

    To celebrate my first ever blog post written on an iPhone in the bath, here’s a picture of May Blossom cuddling Gusto, who is wearing May Blossom’s pyjama top. Everyone should have someone who loves them this much. #Cats #Life #Love #Toddlers
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    Probably For The Best
    jdettmann
    • Nov 18, 2012
    • 1 min

    Probably For The Best

    Must dust cat. To our dear friends whose hen’s and buck’s nights we failed to attend last night, the following conversation is what we were doing instead. Probably for the best we didn’t come, eh? Our bedroom, 8.30 pm. Spoken in whispers. J: Did you put away the other cooked sausage? H: Yes. J: Good, because when I went into the kitchen before, Gusto was licking the pan and I hoped she hadn’t eaten the extra sausage. H: No, I had put it away. J: I figured you must have,
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    How To Feel Better
    jdettmann
    • May 29, 2012
    • 2 min

    How To Feel Better

    1. When she walks down steps, May Blossom has taken to sometimes refusing the proffered hand of her father or me and instead holds her own hand. Independent much? Lacking understanding of the concept of the stabilising force an adult hand can offer? Very, very funny to watch? All of these things. 2. When she wants to warn anyone of anything — that the heater is on; that there is a flight of steps approaching; that the cat is nearing dinner time and could remove the next digit
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    Ups and Downs
    jdettmann
    • Mar 7, 2012
    • 3 min

    Ups and Downs

    In the down column: 1. My 102-year-old grandmother suffered a small stroke. 2. The fate of our missing family cat, Tigercat, was discovered. It was not pretty and probably involved a fox. Vale, Tigercat. 3. Gusto, who is an indoor cat, got out and went missing for several hours on a rainy night. In the up column: 1. My grandmother was released from hospital and is now doing well at home.1. May Blossom slept through the night for the first time. 2. May Blossom slept through th
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    Great Cakes in History
    jdettmann
    • Oct 19, 2011
    • 2 min

    Great Cakes in History

    In the lead-up to May Blossom’s birthday, the cake preparations continue. Today’s post is an homage to some of the great cakes of my childhood. The first, and in my opinion the greatest, is my first birthday cake. It was made by my mother in the shape of my brown burmese cat, Quickly. It is not, as H assumed before I resized the image so he could see the cat’s face, a cake in the shape of Western Australia. It was served, as all the cakes were, on a massive brown plastic tray
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    The Cake Files, Part I
    jdettmann
    • Oct 13, 2011
    • 3 min

    The Cake Files, Part I

    In the lead-up to May Blossom’s birthday, there has been a lot of cake talk. First of all, her Uncle Superchief (my older brother) offered to make it. He suggested it should be in the shape of a rocketship (he is also leading a campaign to restore the suffix -ship to rockets. When and why did they lose that?) with a cat looking out each window (or porthole? Do rocketships have portholes?) I liked the idea, but since May Blossom is my daughter I think I should be the one who b
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