Helpfully, May Blossom and Pipsqueak look like twins born four years apart, so I can illustrate this post with a picture of my own child...

Why the italics, you might ask. What has Gusto done to merit that? Nothing. Gusto is being an exemplary feline. It is the jellicle cats...

So sweet, you’d never know they have tiny ear canals brimming with filth and germs. Nor that the one on the right is about to throw up in...

Tomorrow is May Blossom’s third birthday. If you’d asked me three years ago what I thought my life might look like now, I would have...

Thing 1: Since one or other or another of his or my recent colds or ear infections or other random maladies that have blurred into one...

The state of the carpet on the stairs is too shameful to photograph, so here’s a picture of Garnet in a massive hat instead. Our new...

Remember when I used to write things on this blog? Those were the days, eh? Well, those days might be returning. Things are finally,...

Because I want this to remain a mummy blog, and not morph into a beauty blog, I shall refrain from giving you the contact details of the...

‘It means he’s sad,’ I told her. ‘It’s a metaphor. Why do you think he’s sad?’ ‘I think it’s because he misses his mummy and his sister...

Come the week of the concert and my mum, who had bravely offered to babysit both May Blossom and Garnet, politely asked how we were going...

May Blossom at work in her office. A month or so ago we let May Blossom watch Singin’ In the Rain. We were on the hunt for a movie that...

Garnet has one elf ear. The other is a human ear. We are unsure what, if anything, to make of this. Garnet’s 24 days old. It’s been a bit...

Our little boy was born ten days ago. Sorry it’s taken me so long to put him down and write a post to announce it. But if you smelled his...

An optimist is one who happily rides her friend’s bike with no pants on. I am a pessimist. I specialise in negative visualisation. Much...

One of the many dangerous roads of the world that are all out to get my children, according to my pregnancy-addled brain. Have you ever...

Let’s just get this, in a six-seater version with loads of airbags. We need to get a new car. I find this simultaneously a very boring...

One of the many stunning gender-neutral outfits May Blossom will be handing down to her sibling. According to the medical establishment I...

This pregnancy I have been plagued with insomnia, which is not something I have ever experienced before. I was the kid who could fall...

Here’s a blurry picture of the creature to be known henceforth as NB. Those are the initials of its in utero name, but could equally...

That sort of casual attitude is exactly how I did NOT approach breastfeeding. I approached it with a delightful cocktail of fear,...