jdettmannApr 10, 20173 minHow to Make Terrible GnocchiThe pesto would have been better tossed with small snails than with the gnocchi I made. I know I have a tendency to toot my own horn on...
jdettmannMar 21, 20173 minI Am A Lego DetectiveBut I’m confused, because although I think that’s what I said, what he seems to have heard is, ‘I am a Lego Detective. I can find any...
jdettmannMar 7, 20173 minThe Bullshit Filibuster And Other Surefire Ways To Drive Your Sibling MadMy children have picked up on that and helpfully compensated to bring my overall happiness down to neutral. Both of them are still...
jdettmannFeb 22, 20174 minContact HighThat, of course, is when then the gods strike you down. That is when you all come down with a virus and the teacher sends home a bunch of...
jdettmannOct 25, 20164 minThe Man Who Had No BirthdaysSomeone’s kid has an extendable arm that only comes out when there’s a chocolate fountain. Handy. May Blossom turned six on the weekend...
jdettmannSep 1, 20162 minThe Festival of Dangerous Ideas, As Programmed By My ChildrenFestival of Dangerous Ideas kicks off. My parents are going to heaps of things at this festival, including Alexei Sayle’s talk ‘Thatcher...
jdettmannAug 25, 20165 minArea of Particular InterestThat aside, we are really very extremely excited. We are going to Finland, Sweden and Denmark. The trip has come about because Jess is a...
jdettmannAug 11, 20163 minOlympics Para SiempreWe are disgraceful: this was one of only two photos we have of anyone in this family doing anything even vaguely athletic, while also not...
jdettmannJul 20, 20164 minIn The End, It Was The Odd Socks That Finished Her OffGarnet searching for his socks. We’ve been on a holiday. A driving holiday, and while I’ll try to write about that soon, and tell you all...
jdettmannJun 29, 20163 minIt Turns Out, You Can Go Home AgainSample bookshelf from my parents’ attic: Just one of the many collections of books that tells you probably more than you need to know...
jdettmannJun 22, 20161 minSongs by The Smiths or Things My Three Year Old Said Today?Portrait of Garnet by his sister or Smiths album cover? In lieu of a proper post, today I have a fun game for you, dear readers. It’s...
jdettmannJun 15, 20164 minSticker ShockPart of a Lego exhibition we saw on the weekend and in no way a freakishly accurate representation of our bedroom when it’s my morning to...
jdettmannMay 17, 20164 minThe Joy of SticksFrom top: gun, sword, wand. AKA ‘kindling for Granddad’. I’ve never thought brandishing a stick was a good idea. We were always told by...
jdettmannApr 27, 20165 minNothing Is Fun For The Whole FamilyThis seems lovely, doesn’t it? Until you realise that is not the ocean Garnet is wallowing in but actually self-pity. See the ripples of...
jdettmannMar 23, 20163 minA Hot Cross Son for EasterThis week he has been brought to howling tears by many and varied injustices. There was the fact that I would not go under the house to...
jdettmannMar 16, 20164 minTesting TimesOccasionally he makes up a word (‘You nuckus!’) or just pops something that’s not an insult at all (‘You big sandwich!) None of it is...
jdettmannFeb 15, 20163 minI Wandered Lonely As A Cloud Whose Kids Are Both At SchoolGarnet’s preschool curriculum focuses on how to induce guilt. The slow process of settling the kids into school and preschool continues...
jdettmannDec 20, 20153 minLife’s A TreatLast week Garnet turned three. He’s not a hundred per cent ok with that. The boy has a complicated relationship with the ageing process....
jdettmannNov 2, 20152 minQuestion TimeOne morning – bloody early one morning – he asked me the following questions in the space of half an hour, which is how long it takes to...
jdettmannJun 4, 20153 minLego, Lego, Can’t Hold It Back Any MoreFor about a year we have had, shoved into the cupboard in the playroom where no-one ever goes because it houses the vacuum cleaner, a...